White Knights...

White Knight: (noun)  A state of mind whereby a male feels the need or obligation to rescue maidens from unfortunate circumstances.

I do not know what makes some boys/men step up to the plate when things seem as if they are going badly, and others to run or hide their head in the sand. But, I do know that I had several unexpected "white knights" that came to my side that summer of 1969.

One was a very good friend of my sweethearts. It was the night of graduation, and for whatever reason my sweetheart and I were enjoying a "good" night. We went together for a little celebration party at the home of a class mate. Being pregnant meant that I could not party to the extent that he wanted to, and I grew tired quickly. He said he was going to go outside for a minute to have a smoke, and I waited inside. I waited...I waited...and when I finally went out to see what was taking so long I realized he was gone. Gone to party with other friends without so much as a word to me. Now, I realize that he probably did that to avoid a scene at all costs, but there I was alone again. A good friend of his saw what happened and offered me a ride home. He couldn't understand how he did this to me, why he was being so mean. Once again I was crying, (seems I did a lot of that for a while) but this boy was listening to me. Then out of the blue he suggested that we drive to Canada, and get married. That he would treat me the way I should be treated, that he would take care of me. I remember that I sort of laughed between my tears and said that I did not think that was the answer. So he just wrapped his arms around me and let me cry. He was a white knight coming to my rescue.

When I wasn't going to school much anymore there was another one of his friends that would show up at my door around lunch time. We never talked about anything of importance, but he always made me laugh. He would eat his lunch and then go back to school. It was almost as if he just didn't want me to be alone. Another white knight.

Another white knight enters the kingdom. There was the boy who worked with my sweetheart. If I called my sweetheart at work, this fella was the person who got caught in the middle. He was suppose to either tell me he was busy or that he was not there. Rather than do that he started to talk with me, he would even call me at home to talk with me. Most of the time it was about music or art, but there would be times when he would just listen to me or tell me how he just could not understand my sweethearts bad behavior.

The one that road his horse into my life for the longest period of time was totally unexpected. It was a boy from another school whom I met right after graduation. All the sororities and fraternities rented cottages at a lake and I did go down for a couple days. This fella approached me one night and point blank came out and said that a rumor had me pregnant. Now, I did not know this fella, but I did tell him that the rumor was true. He took it upon himself that summer to make sure I was eating properly, he would take me to the movies, take me out for ice cream, he would call or stop over every day that summer. He was kind and sweet to me, and was one of the only people who would talk with me about what my options were for the baby and myself. All I was hearing from others was how I HAD to place the baby up for adoption because I certainly couldn't take care of a child. He talked to me about how he thought I would be a good mother, that he thought that if I wanted things to work out they could. He also talked to me about adoption and what that would mean to not only myself and the baby but to a couple who could not have a child. He was the one who helped me make the biggest decision I was going to make. He helped me believe that I did have a choice and that I had already made the biggest choice, I choose to carry the baby to term.  He certainly was the most influential white knight to enter my life.

Its not as if people weren't telling me that I was incapable of raising this child because they were. It is not as if I had all the support around me to keep this child because I did not. I knew exactly what my sweetheart thought, his parents thought, and my parents thought, I was just having a hard time finding out what I thought.

I would have to make a decision soon...a decision that would change the lives of everyone, but especially the babies and mine.

Post Script:
(After the baby was born, after the white knight duties were no longer needed. These boys rode off into the sunset. I have never forgotten any of them and the part they played in 1969 and I will be forever grateful to them for all they did for me.)